Something I Need to Say

My latest post from the birthy side of my life: A Voice of Love

I just wanted to share it here, as well, because I think it’s a message so many of us miss. This post has been brewing for awhile, and started with our family’s search for affordable health insurance. We looked into a Christian medical-sharing program that would fit into our budget well. I was feeling optimistic until I looked at their prenatal policies. (Among others, but that’s another story, and didn’t matter to me as much as this particular area.)

Of course, they won’t cover the cost of any abortion. I’m fine with that.

However, neither will they cover the prenatal care of an unwed mother.

So…they want to save babies’ lives, but they’re not willing to help a woman who makes the difficult choice to carry her child to term?

This bothers me deeply.

Though I understand that they want to “promote healthy, godly lifestyles,” and I understand that single moms have the choice to pursue coverage through their state or their employer, I fail to comprehend why the first place a woman should be able to run (the Church) has closed themselves off to her.

The Church is supposed to be a safe place to fall, where you will be picked up, dusted off, and helped along your way. A place where love covers a multitude of sins, and where you can always find someone to walk with you in your desperation. A hospital for the sick. A shelter and food for the poor. A haven for the hopeless.

I am not advocating overlooking and winking at sin. I’m not. God forbid!

I’m only saying that if I am going to err, I choose to err on the side of compassion and love.

After all — there, but for the grace of God, go I.

I am not far removed from the “least of these” myself. The last time I checked, the ground at the foot of the Cross is level. We all stand before God naked, blind, poor, and in great need of something.

Be careful who you criticize. It’s quite likely that what bothers you most about “them” is the plank you carry in your own eye.

Grace & Peace,


6 thoughts on “Something I Need to Say

  1. My first thought was “Mary was an unwed mother”. Okay, I know that other unwed mothers are in that position for a different reason but the judgement was still there. Even Joseph pondered hiding her away.
    Like the Lord has been showing me recently, grace is ALWAYS the right answer. Thank you for pointing this out. I have considered these health plans as well and wouldn’t have thought to read that area. So glad you are on top of things! I learn a lot from you!

    • Exactly, Jem. I would never justify the sin that can lead to an unwed pregnancy. Ever. However, neither would I deny grace to another person who is created in the image of God.

      Who am I to withhold forgiveness when I have been forgiven so much? And honestly – these women did not sin against me. In actuality, I have nothing to forgive.

      • My 2nd daughter was born to a married woman. The catch is, the child was conceived as the result of an affair. So technically she would have been covered during her pregnancy.
        I was just thinking today of how beautiful God’s grace is when although there are things surrounding the birth of a child to an unmarried woman that are inherently difficult, life is a most precious gift. What right do we have to make it harder on a young woman and especially her innocent child.
        You are right about it not being our place to forgive. It is our place to lead them to the God of forgiveness, not cause a stumbling block on their way there!

  2. You’re right to be bothered by that. I’m sure God is bothered by rejecting people in His name. I wish they would just offer medical sharing and not present themselves as a christian organization because they’re not representing Him well.

    • Honestly, it’s not a very good program overall, either, but I agree with you. That particular issue was my deal-breaker. I have worked with unwed mothers a lot as a childbirth educator. Sometimes I think, based on the questions they stay after class to ask me, that I’m the ONLY ONE who actually listens to them and wants to help them. They are really at risk for abuse in the system. Nobody wants to believe that, but it’s true. And it disgusts me that Christians somehow think that they’re just getting what they deserve…and they forget that God has not treated us the way OUR sins deserve.

  3. Ooh. Sorry, but the key words, here, are budget and affordable.
    And Joseph was going to hide Mary because he was a righteous man.
    The alternative, then, was to stone her.
    We, the church, used to help them hide, in homes for unwed mothers, but now we . . . I don’t know. But it is outrageously expensive, that I know.

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