Confessions (Sort of.)

I get defensive first, often before I really listen.

I speak before I think, and have mastered the art of apologizing for dumb things I have said.

Empathy, for me, is a skill and not a  natural talent. If I don’t use it, I lose it.

I am so good at seeing multiple sides to an issue, I often won’t take a side when I should.

I am biased. I am aware of many of these biases but completely blind to others.

I have a streak of cowardice that manifests when I least expect it.

My pride can be insufferable.

“What about me?!” is a thought I have far too frequently.

I am always right. Except when I’m not. Good luck getting me to admit it.

I swear too much – in my head and out loud.

I have never learned to see interruptions as divine appointments. I hate being interrupted.

I procrastinate until it’s detrimental to my own mental health and the health of my household.

I spend too much time on social media.

I sometimes want to completely give up on parenting and let them do whatever the heck they want, because I am exhausted and have no idea what to do next.

My close friends tell me I am far too hard on myself. I don’t believe them. I don’t think I’m hard enough on myself when I believe the standard is the holiness of God.

I am super-opinionated, but I don’t seem to know where and when to share or engage.

I hate debating for the sake of debating. If I debate, it’s because I think I have a shot at changing your mind at some point.

I don’t know why, of all mornings, I decided to write again. And I have written essentially nothing. Thanks for coming.